16
Sep
03

Bart Blackboard Quotes

The Simpsons Archive: Blackboard Openings
Here’s a short list of my favorite Bart Blackboard Quotes, enjoy…

I will not instigate revolution
I will not call my teacher “Hot Cakes”
I will not encourage others to fly
Tar is not a plaything
I will not drive the principal’s car
I will not pledge allegiance to Bart
I will not sell school property
I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment
I am not a dentist
“Bart Bucks” are not legal tender
Underwear should be worn on the inside
I will not aim for the head
I saw nothing unusual in the teacher’s lounge
I will not conduct my own fire drills
My name is not Dr. Death
I will not prescribe medication
I will not teach others to fly
Coffee is not for kids
I will not yell “She’s Dead” during roll call
Goldfish don’t bounce
I will not sell miracle cures
I will return the seeing-eye dog
I do not have diplomatic immunity
I am not delightfully saucy
I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.
Ralph won’t “morph” if you squeeze him hard enough
“Bagman” is not a legitimate career choice
The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far
Fish do not like coffee
SpongeBob is not a contraceptive
Sandwiches should not contain sand

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